Not.
My body thought it would be really funny to gain 3 pounds of water weight. Now, that normally wouldn't bother me because it would then usually drop off. But, this thought it was funny and decided to stay on and make me lose it instead- AGAIN.
Fuckin' body sucks. It hates me and truthfully, I ain't that fond of it. I might not be exercising as much, but I've been eating right and dammit all if my body doesn't hate me. Well, I fucking hate it too.
So, I'm just going with the flow- I managed to lose 7 pounds last month and I'm attempting to do the same here. But, my body is not letting me. I swear to God if it tries to put me at a plateau, I'll...be mad.
Upset. Can you tell? I'll write more when I actually have something to write about.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Interesting Stuff
Strange phenomena has a way of reaching me at almost every turn.
So, the strange phenomena with my weight this week had been this:
Wednesday, I have my late night classes. Despite actually trying to eat healthy (meaning going to the supermarket and looking at their salads and whatnot), I somehow end up not eating healthy (I got two pieces of chicken and a spinach knish- sounds alright, right?). Turns out my choices taste terrible and I end up doing what I always avoid doing- eating at school. If you've ever been to a college campus, you know there's nothing but crap there. So, I try to do my best, but to no avail really. I get the itty bitty sushi package (I know, I was saving sushi for later- but I haven't had it since, I promise) and try to peel off as much rice as possible (that's an old trick I learned from my mom to make things healthier- it's like peeling off the fried part of the chicken. But if your whole point was to go out for fried chicken, then you're fucked really).
Long story above made vaguely shorter- I gained two pounds.
So, the next day I do everything in my power to be good. I have my usual breakfast (a bowl of cereal) to get me through the morning, a salad at lunch, chicken and vegetables for dinner, and some snacks along the way (me being me, the exercise has currently been postponed because my body is trying to get sick. But I work with kids and go to school so THAT AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN). What happens? I barely lose anything. The next day, the scale tells me I've lost .2 pounds. Well, bring out the champagne, we're celebratin'!
Yesterday, I got a speeding ticket- again. It was awful- I really honestly didn't think I was going to fast, but Officer Dillhole seemed to think otherwise (he wasn't too bad actually, but he could've been nicer I guess). So, here I am in front of my friends, crying because of my speeding ticket, unable to breath due to slight sickness, and what do I do? I say fuck it and eat more crap that evening than I've eaten in the past two months. I was super regretting it later and that makes sense because good-tasting food spikes different chemicals in your brain, making you happy when you eat it but then regretting it later (depending on what it was).
And then I woke up just this morning- I was a pound lighter.
????
Strange phenomena. I'll tell ya. So, back to my original lost weight and I just gotta keep trucking. I don't want to self-inflict any plateau here.
Later yall.
So, the strange phenomena with my weight this week had been this:
Wednesday, I have my late night classes. Despite actually trying to eat healthy (meaning going to the supermarket and looking at their salads and whatnot), I somehow end up not eating healthy (I got two pieces of chicken and a spinach knish- sounds alright, right?). Turns out my choices taste terrible and I end up doing what I always avoid doing- eating at school. If you've ever been to a college campus, you know there's nothing but crap there. So, I try to do my best, but to no avail really. I get the itty bitty sushi package (I know, I was saving sushi for later- but I haven't had it since, I promise) and try to peel off as much rice as possible (that's an old trick I learned from my mom to make things healthier- it's like peeling off the fried part of the chicken. But if your whole point was to go out for fried chicken, then you're fucked really).
Long story above made vaguely shorter- I gained two pounds.
So, the next day I do everything in my power to be good. I have my usual breakfast (a bowl of cereal) to get me through the morning, a salad at lunch, chicken and vegetables for dinner, and some snacks along the way (me being me, the exercise has currently been postponed because my body is trying to get sick. But I work with kids and go to school so THAT AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN). What happens? I barely lose anything. The next day, the scale tells me I've lost .2 pounds. Well, bring out the champagne, we're celebratin'!
Yesterday, I got a speeding ticket- again. It was awful- I really honestly didn't think I was going to fast, but Officer Dillhole seemed to think otherwise (he wasn't too bad actually, but he could've been nicer I guess). So, here I am in front of my friends, crying because of my speeding ticket, unable to breath due to slight sickness, and what do I do? I say fuck it and eat more crap that evening than I've eaten in the past two months. I was super regretting it later and that makes sense because good-tasting food spikes different chemicals in your brain, making you happy when you eat it but then regretting it later (depending on what it was).
And then I woke up just this morning- I was a pound lighter.
????
Strange phenomena. I'll tell ya. So, back to my original lost weight and I just gotta keep trucking. I don't want to self-inflict any plateau here.
Later yall.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
As the mighty Beyonce once proclaimed
"If you like it, then you should put a ring on it."
Although I tend to doubt that a ring would fit on my big thighs.
Not to mention, what the hell would you do with a thigh ring?
...I'm getting off subject.
Anyway, 7 pounds (after a freakin' month- yeesh) later, I'mma still workin' on it. The exercise routine continues tonight and my low-fat eating is continuous. What's beautiful about it is that I don't crave sweets and such because I eat dark chocolate all the time. Granted, this time of the month is making it harder to resist such things (prompting me to make chocolate mousse the other night- diet-friendly? No. But delicious? Most certainly yes), but like I said- dark chocolate- it helps.
I am kinda proud of me. Not to be all, "I'm so good look at me" (because this has obviously not been the case for the past...20 years), but it hasn't been like in the past where I say I'm going to lose weight, lose two pounds, get happy, and then promptly gain them back. I was and am so tired of going around in that vicious circle. I'm not saying I'm perfect when it comes to this diet, but I've reached some major personal milestones and that's a lot for me. I have a gut feeling (get it?...never mind) that I'll reach this to the end. I hope so- the minimum goal is 30 pounds, but the ultimate goal is 50. Here's the chart as it stands now:
Beginning weight: 259
Current weight: 252
Time period: 1 month
1st goal: lose ten pounds, get new tshirt
2nd goal: lose twenty pounds, go out for sushi (I know this sounds counter-productive, but if I don't have sushi until then, I actually think it'll help me lose weight. Plus, I know you're never supposed to reward weight loss with food, but I didn't say a dump truck full of sushi- just a meal. Besides...what kind of sushi comes in a dump truck?).
30 pounds...still don't know. I don't want to jinx myself, so I'm trying to take the whole rewarding self thing slowly. I'm more motivated now than I ever have been and I don't want to mess that up with shallow rewards- especially if I gain the weight back.
Alright amigos, I'mma gonna have dinner. I'm super hungry and I don't want to over-indulge. I know myself- easy does it.
Although I tend to doubt that a ring would fit on my big thighs.
Not to mention, what the hell would you do with a thigh ring?
...I'm getting off subject.
Anyway, 7 pounds (after a freakin' month- yeesh) later, I'mma still workin' on it. The exercise routine continues tonight and my low-fat eating is continuous. What's beautiful about it is that I don't crave sweets and such because I eat dark chocolate all the time. Granted, this time of the month is making it harder to resist such things (prompting me to make chocolate mousse the other night- diet-friendly? No. But delicious? Most certainly yes), but like I said- dark chocolate- it helps.
I am kinda proud of me. Not to be all, "I'm so good look at me" (because this has obviously not been the case for the past...20 years), but it hasn't been like in the past where I say I'm going to lose weight, lose two pounds, get happy, and then promptly gain them back. I was and am so tired of going around in that vicious circle. I'm not saying I'm perfect when it comes to this diet, but I've reached some major personal milestones and that's a lot for me. I have a gut feeling (get it?...never mind) that I'll reach this to the end. I hope so- the minimum goal is 30 pounds, but the ultimate goal is 50. Here's the chart as it stands now:
Beginning weight: 259
Current weight: 252
Time period: 1 month
1st goal: lose ten pounds, get new tshirt
2nd goal: lose twenty pounds, go out for sushi (I know this sounds counter-productive, but if I don't have sushi until then, I actually think it'll help me lose weight. Plus, I know you're never supposed to reward weight loss with food, but I didn't say a dump truck full of sushi- just a meal. Besides...what kind of sushi comes in a dump truck?).
30 pounds...still don't know. I don't want to jinx myself, so I'm trying to take the whole rewarding self thing slowly. I'm more motivated now than I ever have been and I don't want to mess that up with shallow rewards- especially if I gain the weight back.
Alright amigos, I'mma gonna have dinner. I'm super hungry and I don't want to over-indulge. I know myself- easy does it.
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Did anyone ever go to camp?
I only ask because they used to sing that song when they wanted to announce something. It went vaguely along these lines: "ANNOUNCEMENTS ANNOUNCEMENTS ANNOUNCEMENTS! What a horrible way to die, a horrible way to die, hi ho the dairyo, announcements, hey!"
Yeah, now that I think about it, it was a pretty awful song. But anyway, the whole point is that I too have an announcement:
I'm the slimmest I've been in a while!
*waits for applause*
Actually, I probably don't deserve applause because I haven't really exercised all that much. And I won't be able to keep it off unless I do, so I'm getting back into my exercise routine. If I want this to happen for real, then the exercise has to happen as well (although I did climb seven flights of stairs yesterday TWICE. Oh yeah, how hardcore am I?).
I figure when I lose ten pounds, I'll reward myself with a new shirt (as I have found in the past that rewarding yourself with a little treat then unravels the whole thing. So...not so much). Actually, I ordered a shirt that says, "Worlds Goodest Teecher" (which is funny to me because I plan on being a teacher. But, we'll see how funny my education teachers think it is. They don't tend to have senses of humor).
So, I believe the starting weight was around 259; the current weight: 253.
Let's do this shit.
Yeah, now that I think about it, it was a pretty awful song. But anyway, the whole point is that I too have an announcement:
I'm the slimmest I've been in a while!
*waits for applause*
Actually, I probably don't deserve applause because I haven't really exercised all that much. And I won't be able to keep it off unless I do, so I'm getting back into my exercise routine. If I want this to happen for real, then the exercise has to happen as well (although I did climb seven flights of stairs yesterday TWICE. Oh yeah, how hardcore am I?).
I figure when I lose ten pounds, I'll reward myself with a new shirt (as I have found in the past that rewarding yourself with a little treat then unravels the whole thing. So...not so much). Actually, I ordered a shirt that says, "Worlds Goodest Teecher" (which is funny to me because I plan on being a teacher. But, we'll see how funny my education teachers think it is. They don't tend to have senses of humor).
So, I believe the starting weight was around 259; the current weight: 253.
Let's do this shit.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Here's to being a Jew
'Cause on the Yom Kippur diet, I don't get to eat for 24 hours! Isn't that...something...
I find myself lagging in this. It might be because of the mass amount of paperwork that has been shitted on me since last I wrote. Or it could be my perpetual laziness. Who knows.
I have no given up on myself though. I'm still dieting and I'm doing ok. Nothing major unfortunately- but I'm doing alright. Exercising and not gaining any weight back.
I don't know what I'm doing wrong- I'm following a new diet that's great. It has me eating salads and eggs and all kinds of good things. And I've been monitoring myself for cheating- I can honestly say this is the best I've ever been when it comes to cheating. Truly. Maybe it's because my diet allows me dark chocolate. That might be it.
I went ice skating and laser tagging yesterday- I highly recommend it for workout purposes. Warning: ice skating will cause blisters. Trust me, people.
However, laser tagging is great because not only do you run around shooting people, but the adrenaline is so much that your heart is beating quickly. You're working out your heart which is good. Adrenaline helps- so long as it doesn't get overwhelming.
Anyway, that's about it for now. As it stands, I'm 255 and workin' my way slowly down. When I get to 10 pounds lost, I'm celebrating by buying a new t-shirt. Yay!
Alrighty all, off to write my paper. Fun.
I find myself lagging in this. It might be because of the mass amount of paperwork that has been shitted on me since last I wrote. Or it could be my perpetual laziness. Who knows.
I have no given up on myself though. I'm still dieting and I'm doing ok. Nothing major unfortunately- but I'm doing alright. Exercising and not gaining any weight back.
I don't know what I'm doing wrong- I'm following a new diet that's great. It has me eating salads and eggs and all kinds of good things. And I've been monitoring myself for cheating- I can honestly say this is the best I've ever been when it comes to cheating. Truly. Maybe it's because my diet allows me dark chocolate. That might be it.
I went ice skating and laser tagging yesterday- I highly recommend it for workout purposes. Warning: ice skating will cause blisters. Trust me, people.
However, laser tagging is great because not only do you run around shooting people, but the adrenaline is so much that your heart is beating quickly. You're working out your heart which is good. Adrenaline helps- so long as it doesn't get overwhelming.
Anyway, that's about it for now. As it stands, I'm 255 and workin' my way slowly down. When I get to 10 pounds lost, I'm celebrating by buying a new t-shirt. Yay!
Alrighty all, off to write my paper. Fun.
Monday, September 21, 2009
So...
Whenever I wake up early in the morning, despite having been good and working out the night before, I always gain weight. And when I wake up late, I end up losing weight.
I'm trying really hard- working out and eating well. But if I wake up early, for whatever stupid illogical reason, I gain weight. So I've barely lost anything. And this time means more than the other times when I've lost two pounds and just been done. I want this- I don't want to be fat anymore. I just don't know what to do.
That's my emo post- probably should've forewarned you. Also, homework- uncool.
*sighsies* still workin'. Let ya know.
I'm trying really hard- working out and eating well. But if I wake up early, for whatever stupid illogical reason, I gain weight. So I've barely lost anything. And this time means more than the other times when I've lost two pounds and just been done. I want this- I don't want to be fat anymore. I just don't know what to do.
That's my emo post- probably should've forewarned you. Also, homework- uncool.
*sighsies* still workin'. Let ya know.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Holy Inferiority Complex, Batman!
It's been three weeks! Meaning...
Not much has happened. Crap.
My excuse is mainly the sickness, otherwise I wouldn't have stopped exercising. However, I am fully capable of breathing again (a tool needed in exercising/living), so it resumes tonight (despite the consumption of red wine that is making me sleepy)!
My pattern of thinking when it has come to food has significantly changed since the beginning of this. I always wait to see if it will and this time it actually has. I think it officially happened when I had some challah tonight (delicious Jew bread...yummy) and I picked up a big piece next to me...and I didn't want all of it. I was eating it and it tasted good, but then I put it down next to me and said, "I'm okay now." It relates back to that other huge epiphany being that I can have a bite and be done, only this is better- it's learning to control my impulse to immediately jump for familiar food.
My maturity knows no bounds, you poopy-heads! Ok, it needs work. But you get the gist- I'm still 255, but that's ok, because now the exercise can resume. Order can be restored. And I can go from slightly cute fat chick to hot chick (who, out of habit, will call herself a fat chick).
I'm not setting a deadline for myself because it'll subconsciously put too much pressure on myself and I will not fail on this one. This time's different- I can't begin to tell you why as you don't know me (except for my father currently reading this- hey Dad!) but it just is. So...yeah.
Alright, I'mma gonna try some exercises (no falling asleep because of alcohol...that wine sure was good though). Until next time!
Not much has happened. Crap.
My excuse is mainly the sickness, otherwise I wouldn't have stopped exercising. However, I am fully capable of breathing again (a tool needed in exercising/living), so it resumes tonight (despite the consumption of red wine that is making me sleepy)!
My pattern of thinking when it has come to food has significantly changed since the beginning of this. I always wait to see if it will and this time it actually has. I think it officially happened when I had some challah tonight (delicious Jew bread...yummy) and I picked up a big piece next to me...and I didn't want all of it. I was eating it and it tasted good, but then I put it down next to me and said, "I'm okay now." It relates back to that other huge epiphany being that I can have a bite and be done, only this is better- it's learning to control my impulse to immediately jump for familiar food.
My maturity knows no bounds, you poopy-heads! Ok, it needs work. But you get the gist- I'm still 255, but that's ok, because now the exercise can resume. Order can be restored. And I can go from slightly cute fat chick to hot chick (who, out of habit, will call herself a fat chick).
I'm not setting a deadline for myself because it'll subconsciously put too much pressure on myself and I will not fail on this one. This time's different- I can't begin to tell you why as you don't know me (except for my father currently reading this- hey Dad!) but it just is. So...yeah.
Alright, I'mma gonna try some exercises (no falling asleep because of alcohol...that wine sure was good though). Until next time!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)